By Simon Daykin

Right then, We’re gonna do it a little different this issue no pictures, just info!!!  During the Bridal Fair I got a ton of questions about what to look for when going after a Wedding Planner.  You know you need one, but you want to make sure you get the right one.  You don’t want a “CCP” or a little old blue haired lady that has no idea what the current trends and styles are, so you need to know what to look for yes!?!  Oh, “CCP” is a phrase I coined that means “Clipboard Clutching Planner”, this planner resembles a deer in the headlights, but with a clipboard!  So below are my 8 Simple Rules To Finding A Wedding Planner.

Here we go in no particular order…

1. Can They Provide “The Hook Up”?
Does the Wedding Planner have good relationships with vendors and venues?  Can they pull you the discounts?  Do vendors and venues want to work with them?  We pass on all the discounts that we get from vendors DIRECTLY to our clients, and we get those discounts because we bring those vendors a lot of business and they love working with us.  Having your planner be able to “hook you up” is one of the reasons you hire a planner in the first place.  Your planner should be fighting for you to get you the best deals they can.

2. Are They Insured?
Pretty simple question no???  A lot of planners are not insured, they rely on venue insurance which doesn’t always cover them.  You MUST make sure that in the event of any kind of accident, both you and your planner are covered.  Wearing a lampshade on your head at a party (when it’s your choice) can be hilarious, having a lampshade fall from the ceiling and bonk one of your guests on the noggin….not so funny.  It’s your ass, so cover it guys!!!

3. You Got A Real Purdy Website
What is their web presence like?  Do they have a great site out there?  People seem to love this internet thing and do tons of research before they even contact a planner.  So take a look at the planner’s website.  And this is always a red flag for me…do they have a real email address.  Is it weddingplanner25@hotmail.com or is it info@fireflyoccasions.com?  Have they taken the time to set up a real email? This may be the web snob in me, but I feel that real email addresses are REALLY important!

4. And Speaking Of Websites…
Really look at the portfolio section.  Does the planner have a varied portfolio or do all the weddings kinda look the same?  You want your wedding to be as unique as you, so you need to know that the planner can pull off a unique wedding.  You don’t want to become just another wedding in the eyes of your guests.  Also look to see if the venues in the back ground are different.  If the planner works mostly with the same venue I find that they become “lazy” in their design strategies and reproduce old weddings, and you don’t want that either.

5. Full Time, Part Time Or Just Time To Time
Does the planner you’re looking at work as a planner full time?  You want to be able to contact your planner when you need to.  If they are at their day job from 9-5 do you really think you’ll get their best when they get home and THEN start planning your wedding?  When I’m done at work, all I want to do is watch TV and veg the hell out.  So are they planning weddings full time or is this a hobby business for them?  I don’t want to knock newer planners or part time planners, but if I were building a house, I’d hire a guy who builds homes for a living, not a guy who builds them in his spare time.  Hire a professional. I’m just sayin’…

6. “Preferred” Isn’t Always A Good Thing
In the wedding industry there are things called preferred vendor lists.  When you meet with a venue they may recommend people to you.  This seems great, the venue says they’re cool…so they must be, right?  Well not always.  Preferred vendor lists can be bought. A vendor can give the venue a chunk of money to be on that list.  The venue may not have EVER even worked with them, but they pay, so they play.  Ask the venue if their list is based on reputation and talent or if companies can simply buy a spot on the list.

7.  Is Your Planner An “Expert”?
Does your planner travel?  Do they attend conferences?  Hell, do they speak at those conferences?  Is your planner an Expert in their field? I feel planners should travel and always be learning more stuff, because let’s face it…you can’t be trekking all over hells half acre looking for new wedding trends.  It’s the planner’s job to do the learning for you and bring that to the table when planning and designing your wedding.  Ask them if they belong to any Associations, if they speak at conferences and if they travel to track down the latest and greatest in wedding stuff.

8. And Finally, Do They Know You Exist?
When I was getting married, I had to insert myself into any meeting I wanted to attend, because most planners only focus on the Bride. It’s not their fault, they don’t know any better.  They focus on the Bride because history tells them the Groom wasn’t interested.  Well that was THEN, this is NOW and we’re re-writing history here fellas.  Make sure your planner knows you, the Groom exists and that you want your opinion heard.  When you meet with your planner for the first time, make sure you attend that meeting.  You can get a lot from a first impression, if the planner doesn’t ask you your opinion when they first meet you, it’s a good bet they won’t…ever!

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

I know some of the above points may seem a little harsh, but after some of the questions I got last weekend I had to write this.  I hate having the Groom overlooked in the planning process.  Now I can’t do anything for you if you take yourself out of the process, but you won’t do that will you???

The thing is, the odds are very good that you will not figure out you hired the wrong planner until your big day comes and it all goes pear shaped.  So if you follow these 8 simple rules, you’ll have a better chance of getting it right the first time.  And don’t be afraid to ask the planner for references, ask them to hook you up with their past clients, the parents of past clients, hell…ask them for vendor references from photographers or DJ’s etc they have worked with in the past.  See what the other pros in the industry have to say about them.

It never gets any better than a first impression, you’ll be spending a lot of time with the planner you choose so make sure it’s a good fit.

Click here to book your free consultation with Firefly Occasions & Gutsy Groom and we’ll take care of everything…and everyone!!!

By Ciara Daykin

It doesn’t matter what venue you’re getting married in or where you’re having your wedding reception, it’s all about the logistics. From the way you organize the timing of your entrance to the reveal of your wedding cake you can use each opportunity to WOW your guests. And the best part, is it’s simply the logistics of the day, and often these little tweaks are low cost to no cost for any bride and groom to do.
Enter With A Big Oooo Ahhh
Every bride wants all eyes on her when she enters into the room. Well, at a wedding we did (that actually won the award for 2008 Best Ceremony Décor in Canada) we had the bridal party walk down the aisle to a string trio playing Pachabel’s Canon. Pretty typical wedding right? But then… when the doors opened to reveal the bride, instead a trumpeter walked out of the doors and joined in the song and then the bride followed. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house.

Sure we could have had the trumpeter standing with the rest of the band the entire time but then we would have missed out on the DRAMA!

Cocktails Blah, Dinner OMG!

At a wedding we did on New Year’s Eve we had the cocktails take place in one third of the ballroom. We used all the hotel furniture and linens and had a couple of simple white flower arrangements. It was pretty but nothing out of this world. But then when it came time for dinner, we opened the airwall separating the ballroom and revealed an amazing dining area complete with an 80’ red drape backdrop, silver chiavari adorned tables with overflowing red flower centerpieces, lampshade chandeliers and pinspotted tables. People’s arms shot up trying to take pictures over other guests.

No extra money was spent on this big reveal. We could have had the airwall open the entire time. But to give the guests a big surprise it was logistically brilliant to keep the airwall closed so they could all experience the reveal at the same time.

Wedding Cake Goes From Hum Drum to Holy Wow!
One of my favorite ways to do this is with the wedding cake. At one wedding we put it on a stage above all the guest tables. It was a beautiful cake with butterflies on it and we put up a white drape behind it, lit it from behind and attached faux butterflies to the drape to make it look like the butterflies were flying off the cake. It was a small logistical change from having the cake in the middle of the room at eye level but it increased the grandeur of this unique cake.

With that same wedding we got wind up butterflies and wound them up and put them inside each guest napkin and then put a Jones soda on top, which was the favor. When people went to undo their napkin a butterfly fluttered out causing big laughter and smiles of surprise.

Ciara’s Bridal Advice

Take a look at your wedding currently. Where are you spending your budget to impress your guests? With a simple logistical tweak could you double the impact? Comb through each detail and you’ll be surprised at where you could add in some lavish logistics.

By Ciara Daykin

I was reminded recently of a bride who neglected to thank her sister-in-law during a wedding shower and it tragically led to a 2-year rift in their relationship. The bride’s misstep in not thanking the other person was completely unintentional. It simply happened because she was invited to say a few words to everyone during the shower and she was so nervous speaking in public that she forgot to mention her sister-in-law. Long story short: Her sister-in-law didn’t speak to her for 2 years and the relationship is only now being mended.

It totally sucks and you don’t want this to happen to you!

There are a lot of things going on in a bride’s life as she gets ready for her wedding. Between showers and rehearsals and just showing off your ring and the wedding day itself, there’ll be a lot of times when peoples’ eyes are on you. Being the center of attention can be fun, but only if you’re ready.

If you haven’t done so yet, take the time to prepare a handful of speeches/ talking points which you can have memorized and ready to deliver at a moment’s notice. While you may not be giving speech after speech you’ll be telling your story multiple times… and there may be some parts you want to keep private, so figuring out what you want to share before you’re asked is the best idea. But don’t memorize them to the point where your delivery makes you sound like a robot. Here are some things you’ll need to cover:

• How did you get engaged?- People will want to know and you’ll need to say it over and over. Make sure your story matches the mood of the engagement. Was it romantic? Make sure you highlight the romance in your story. Was it spontaneous? Make sure you highlight the spontaneity. Was it fun? Zany? Unusual? Highlight those elements and talk about why it is special to you. It’s fun to relive the moment and share why you said yes!
• So dear… tell me about yourself?- His Aunty is sure to ask this one if you’re just getting to know his extended family. You might want to tell a couple of sentences about yourself, about your groom, and about what you plan to do once you’re married–  such as where you’ll live and what your aspirations are.
• Who should I be thanking?- You don’t want to forget anyone in your main wedding or rehearsal speech so start making a list of who to thank and when. It can hurt a relationship forever if you’re seen as the ungrateful bride. Remember that the people who’ve helped you put on your wedding are doing it because they love you but mega emotions are involved in a wedding and it is a time that can either solidify or destroy relationships.

Ciara’s Bridal Advice

Speaking in front of people can be scary, but what better way to let your personality shine through? Just be yourself and be sincere and your speech will be a hit. And don’t forget- your groom will more than likely have to give a speech or two as well, and he’s probably just as worried about it as you are! So why not write your speeches together and practice them on one another? Don’t forget to thank him in your speech either. He’s been putting up with all this wedding chaos too.

A BONUS TIP- Get some great thank you cards and practice the art of appreciation. Whether a friend buys you a wedding magazine, your aunt sends you some lace from your Gramma’s dress, or your girlfriends throw you a shower- you should be sending out sincere thank you cards. The more thank you cards sent before the wedding the more joy there will be at your wedding. (In my DIY Wedding Planning System I have a whole template to make thanking easy- it’s 50% off right now with code HOLIDAYS09.)

Ciara Daykin is the CEO of Firefly Occasions Inc. a wedding and event planning company with offices in Calgary, Alberta Canada and Beverly Hills, California, USA. Ciara’s popular bi-weekly ezine newsletter is read by over 7500 brides. Ciara is a frequent speaker at wedding industry functions and coaches other wedding planners across North America.

Ciara provides each bride she works with the haute couture wedding experience. Her planning website can be found at http://www.fireflyoccasions.com/ where you can sign up for her free report, “10 Tips to Take Your Wedding From Cookie Cutter to Couture.” She and her husband Simon Daykin are a husband and wife planning team and document their adventures on their popular blog http://sheandheplanweddings.com/

By Simon Daykin

OK guys, everyone makes New Year’s resolutions. Most (myself included) forget all about them, there is a ton of dust on my gym membership card…but I digress. I’m gonna let you know of 5 easy resolutions you can make to make the planning process easier on you and your bride. And if we’re honest here…a happy Bride makes the process SO MUCH EASIER! So take heed fellas, grab a pen or hit print on your computer and file these away for a rainy day so you can surprise your Bride to be with your awesomeness.

Be A Groom Who Takes

By this I mean take stuff OFF her plate. Go through the things on her “need to do” list, find stuff that you’re interested in and take them over. It’s not that tough and could be fun. If you like music and food, take those and own them. Look for DJ’s or bands, get their demo cd and check them out. Go to the hotel and talk to the chef, see if you can help design the menu. You will of course want to take your fiancé to the tasting but you can do all the leg work leading up to it. Don’t just sit back and let her try to do everything. The marriage is a team effort, so is the wedding and the planning should be as well.

Listen, Listen, Listen

As the planning process goes along, your Bride is going to need to talk to you. You must listen to her. She may not need you to fix anything, she may just need you to listen. (If you get confused, as I do…ask her what she wants you to do, but ask nicely) Sure there are forums and what not, but sometimes she will have to talk to you. Be patient and see what she wants you to do. She may be complaining about how many DJ’s she is having to contact (See above section) if she is complaining about getting overwhelmed, then see if she wants to hire a planner. (Here’s a good one.) The most important thing to do is listen to her.

Take Time For The Two Of You

Make time for the two of you to do stuff that isn’t wedding related. Sounds simple but a lot of people forget this one. Go out to dinner, but don’t talk about the wedding, go see a movie, you’re not even allowed to talk there. Go out with friends and have a good time. Try to do something non wedding related at least once a week. It’ll help you get back to normal. My wife and I run this company together, we work together every day, it’s pretty hard to not talk about wedding planning at dinner…but we try and so should you. It helps. So feel free to surf blogs and gossip pages while you’re at work so you have something to talk about when you get home.

Give A Little Along The Way

Give her stuff, it doesn’t have to be huge things. Sometimes flowers and a nice card will make all the difference to her. Things to let her know you are thinking of her and you love her and you can’t wait to get married to her. You can set this up in your work calendar so you get prompted when the time comes. She’ll think it’s spontaneous (but you’ll know better) You can get romantic about it and as the days lead up to the wedding, you could send her something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. Just be sure to explain it in the card you attach.

Don’t Be Afraid To Speak Up

This wedding is a combination of both of you. Don’t forget this. Sure you need to listen to her, but you need your ideas heard as well. Don’t let her mash all your ideas into the dirt like a poorly protected quarterback (holy crap, I think that is my first sports reference in 2 years of writing this!!!) Sure you may need to compromise on some of your ideas, but make sure you are heard and that she listens to you as well. The wedding should be a true combination of BOTH your personalities, just as the marriage will be down the road.

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

The planning process can take its toll on couples, that shouldn’t be news to anyone. But there are simple ways you can help to make it easier. If you don’t support her, the whole thing is gonna suck, if you don’t get your ideas heard, you may get angry and resent you never got the wedding you wanted. So try to make the planning process a team thing.

It can be fun. It doesn’t have to be work. How tough would it be to have the boys over on a Saturday, break out the bottles and concoct your signature drink? Yeah, not that tough really is it!?!? Will it really be a chore to eat a few steaks to see which one you like the best? Nope. So grab that list, take over some items and get on that. Own those items guys. She’ll love you for it…wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

So in closing, take the time to just hang out with your fiancé, and you can start this over the holidays as well. Not every conversation needs to be about the wedding, if she doesn’t believe you…show her this E-zine. I’m apparently an expert in this stuff so my word counts. Good luck guys, I know you can all do it.

Click here to book a free meeting and get started planning your one of a kind wedding, we can take all the stress off you and your Bride so you can focus on the fun of being engaged.

So Happy Holidays, have a great New Year…may the turkey be moist and the wine properly chilled. See you in 2010!!!

By Simon Daykin

Last year North Americans spent over 52 Billion dollars on clothes, sadly most did not buy any style. Don’t believe me? Next time you’re travelling internationally, try to pick out the North Americans in the airport. They are pretty easy to spot for the most part, walking piles of laundry. Oversized sweaters, rumpled pants, baseball hats, etc. In contrast, look at the European travelers, smart, well dressed, hair styled and great shoes. Still comfortable for flying, but they look good while doing it.

I always say that it is never a bad thing to be the best dressed guy in the room, and I stand by this 100%. I have also noticed that some guys just don’t know how to choose well fitted clothes, the shoulders on their shirt end at their triceps, or the neck is WAY too big for them. Did you know that when a suit jacket is buttoned up and you pull it away from your body, there should only be the length of your thumb between your body and the jacket? Any more space and the jacket is not the right fit for you. I know casual Friday is recognized in most offices, but seriously guys, that doesn’t mean baggy jeans, old stinky sneakers and a “Golden Boy” T-shirt.

Shall We Begin?

I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again. The suit is not the be all and end all, you need to add your style to it. Accessorize my friends…add pocket squares, a kick ass tie, amazing shoes, even socks can make an impact. I have my Union Jack socks that I wear to most events, yup, they get noticed. The suit is a great place to start but it needs to be added to. And when choosing the suit, I suggest making a trip to a high end suit store to pick the salesman’s brain. Ask about style trends, colors that are in that season and how to accessorize if you don’t feel comfortable doing it yourself. Also, if you have a friend or co worker that dresses really well and you like their style, ask them a few questions, trust me…they will be flattered you did. If you pick up your suit or tux rental and go with what they give you, then you’ll just look like every other guy who got married over the last decade or so, and we don’t want that do we!?!?!

Size Does Matter

It’s a pretty simple concept, but it’s also simple to screw this up because a lot of guys don’t know exactly what to look for. A well tailored suit will make you look a million times better than a suit you pulled off the rack at say…Sears. When choosing your shirts and suits make sure that the shoulder seams fall on your shoulders. Pretty simple concept right? Now have a look at the general public the next time you’re out and see how many guys have broken this rule. A collar on a dress shirt should fit snugly around your neck, not too tight though. If you can fit more than one finger between you and your collar, that neck size is not the right one for you. If you’re getting married on a beach and you’re going with the golf shirt style, the shirt should end just below the waist…not down at the crotch, you ain’t K-Fed! With the pants, a pant worn lower will elongate your torso, I like this look and it works for me. A higher waistline will make your torso appear shorter and more stocky. A jacket that drapes low on you will give you the appearance of having shorter legs, but a shorter cut on the jacket will make them appear longer. It’s important to try on a few different styles to make sure you get the right one for you.

Quality Always Wins

You can always tell the difference between a tailored suit or tux and one that is off the rack. Be it the lining, the stitching, the fabric the garment is made of and most of the time, the fit itself. If you are renting, go to a higher end rental place, forget Moore’s rentals and the “booklet” people. Go to a place that has stock on site and will let you try stuff on. NEVER, EVER order sight unseen! If you’ve decided to get married in a suit, buy a new suit for the wedding, a custom suit, just for you. I suggest www.indochino.com, I get all my suits from here and I can say, they do good work. You can wear that suit after your wedding, it’s not the dress that gets wrapped in plastic and stuck in a box. So spend a little extra on it. You’ll have it for a long time.

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

At your wedding you should be the best dressed guy in the room, nay…you MUST be! So do your research, look into various styles, look at both suits and tuxes as options. Research the colors and accessories and go shoe shopping. Never wear the rental shoes! Try EVERYTHING on! If you’re thinking about wearing it on your wedding day, try it on before hand. Put on the full look, down to the cufflinks and socks. If you’re wearing sunglasses for an outdoor ceremony, put those on with the outfit, they may not look as good with a suit as they do with a beer and boardshorts. And make sure they fit properly, sunglasses should fit the frame of your face, not hang off the side.
There are plenty of places and people out there that you really have no excuse to be ill dressed at your wedding, or really any day of your life. Don’t be afraid to ask, or visit if you have any questions. If you don’t want to go out in public with your style questions, the internet is there for you in the privacy of your own home. Sites such as www.indochino.com have style tips on a wide variety of subjects, www.themanregistry.com has a stable of experts (myself included) just waiting to help you out, www.Youtube.com can show you how to tie a bow tie and I’m always available should you need me.

So in closing gentlemen, remember that fashion is fun, once you have a few rules that work for you on the basics, try new things, add brighter colors and may every suit you wear be a well fitted one.

DIY Wedding Planning System

The DIY Wedding Planning System is filled with interviews with expert vendors, a step by step guide to planning your wedding, templates and spreadsheets to keep you organized and help you save money. Some of my fav calls are the ones where Simon and I share our design ideas, so grooms don’t you be afraid to get involved as well! Just click here and join in on all the fun!

Suit Up!!! Every Man Needs A Tux

If there is one thing every man should have in his wardrobe, it’s a Tux. You don’t have to go with the classic tux either. The Nouveaux Socialite is a great example of gracefully updating a classic tuxedo. With a satin strap along the edge of the peak tux lapels, and an accompanying stripe along the side of the pants (i.e. classic tux pants) this tuxedo is ideal for the man that wants to stand out at a black tie event or try something a little different for his wedding. Plus it comes as a 3 piece with a vest, so it’s a little more versatile than your average tux. I own this particular tux and it is a kick ass piece of clothing. I even got mine with pink lining.

Click here to start shopping.

By Ciara Daykin

John Lennon said, “Always remember this: A kiss will never miss, and after many kisses a miss becomes a misses.” The first kiss as husband and wife is a super special one. It’s the picture perfect moment when you hear those words, “You may now kiss the bride.” And your honey and you connect for your big kiss.

But what’s your perfect wedding kiss?

It’s kinda funny to think about but this is THE KISS that will kick off your whole marriage. Are you going to plan for it? Are you just going to wing it?

This time of year we’re all feeling pretty cozy with the holidays on their way so it’s a good time to practice your various BIG kiss options:

1. French Kiss- This is the BIG kiss that can be combined with the Dip but it’s all about totally embracing your new partner, opening your mouth and showing off all your passion for this person with one big kiss. I wouldn’t suggest leading with your tongue or totally making out in front of everyone but the French kiss done tastefully can be quite spectacular.
2. The Peck- This is a kiss where you just gently kiss your spouse. It’s soft, it’s tender and Gramma approved. The couple is often holding hands and you can see that they are maybe a little shy when it comes to public displays of affection.
3. The Dip- The famous kiss in New York City’s Times Square on August 15th 1945 was captured by Navy Lt. Victor Jorgensen’s camera. This kiss was to celebrate Japan announcing its unconditional surrender but it gives you a good model for what would make a fab wedding kiss. Just be careful not to drop her guys!
4. The Leg Lift- Some girls lift their leg when they kiss, which reminds me of movie kisses. Where it’s soooo good that she just can’t help but lift her leg. In a big gown though the effect might be as intended to if you’re going that route make sure it looks cute. If you’re a comedian at heart have him lift his leg and that’ll get everyone chuckling.
5. Jump Into His Arms Kiss- I remember watching Trista and Ryan’s wedding on TV a couple of year’s back. They actually practiced their kiss at their rehearsal as she jumped into his arms for a kiss. So couples take this one step further and the groom actually picks up his bride and gives her the first kiss. I’m not really a fan of the jump into his arms and wrap your legs around him first kiss, save that for the honeymoon.

Ciara’s Bridal Advice

The BIG wedding kiss is a really fun part of the ceremony. It’s also a part of the wedding that is completely up to the two of you! Don’t try to do something that is out of character for you. Go with what feels comfortable and natural. That’s what’s going to make the moment special for you and your guests and make for the best picture.

Ciara Daykin is the CEO of Firefly Occasions Inc. a wedding and event planning company with offices in Calgary, Alberta Canada and Beverly Hills, California, USA. Ciara’s popular bi-weekly ezine newsletter is read by over 7500 brides. Ciara is a frequent speaker at wedding industry functions and coaches other wedding planners across North America.  Ciara provides each bride she works with the haute couture wedding experience. Her planning website can be found at http://www.fireflyoccasions.com/ where you can sign up for her free report, “10 Tips to Take Your Wedding From Cookie Cutter to Couture.” She and her husband Simon Daykin are a husband and wife planning team and document their adventures on their popular blog http://sheandheplanweddings.com/

Simon and I have a big Halloween party every year. I just read my friend JJ Virgin’s advice for having a more waistline friendly gathering and I wanted to share her tips with you as I know all you brides out there are focused on looking your best in your wedding gowns. JJ’s 21 Day Fast Track Program is an amazing and smart way to obtain the shape you crave. Click here to read all about it. An enjoy JJ’s tips for Halloween below!

Love & bridal bliss,

Ciara

Frighteningly Fun Halloween Ideas
By JJ Virgin

Most of us get scared to death as bags full of Halloween candy call out to us from store shelves. Some of you are convinced that you get fat just looking at these harbingers of hedonism. Guess what? It doesn’t have to be that way. There are loads of alternatives out there that will thrill and delight your kids and keep waistlines (and dental bills) in check. Number one rule: Don’t buy your favorite treats – keep the enemy out of the house. Follow these rules instead:

• Leave the candy on the shelf and give trick or treaters something that NO ONE else has thought of – fun toys, stickers and tattoos, silly noses, vampire teeth, fake scars, kazoos, streamers, balloons with funny sayings… use your imagination! Kids love this stuff and it’s a great alternative to yet another gooey chocolate treat. Don’t they get enough of that already?

NOTE: If you feel you must toss some candy into the mix, then select hard candy like Jolly Ranchers and lollipops and suckers that take a long time to eat, are typically lower in calories and aren’t loaded with trans fats.

• Before your kids go trick or treating – FEED THEM! Kids don’t eat when they are full (unlike us adults….). You might even toss in an apple or some fruit as dessert just to quell their sweet tooth.
• If the enemy does show up in the house – and you know it will – throw it in the freezer. One: you won’t see or smell it so the trigger is removed. Two: you can’t pig out on it, otherwise you’ll risk breaking a tooth! Only take out what you can have to continue to earn a B+ on your program. Those little snack size candy bars are perfect for instituting the 3 bite rule. By the way, I wouldn’t advise you freeze your kids’ snacks to limit them. Instead, for them:
• Insist on inspecting all candy when the kids get home and have them get rid of the stuff they have no interest in eating. Then, let them pick out three things (small ones). Let them know they will be allowed one treat a day and HIDE the rest of it (make sure YOU take control of the booty). They will forget about it. I toss a little out each day too, and guess what… they never notice it.

If you are having a party for your kids – serve hot apple cider or hot cocoa. I make great healthy hot cocoa with xylitol as my sweetener and unsweetened cocoa. It takes longer to serve hot drinks, which slows down the consumption of junk too. How about deviled eggs decorated like eyeballs, and raw veggies with peanut butter and cheese sticks – arrange them to look like crooked fingers on a hand. Play fun, healthy games: bob for apples or guess the body part (put creepy stuff in paper bags – peeled grapes for eyeballs, spaghetti for intestines, etc.) and focus on activity rather than eating at these get-togethers. Last Halloween, I was surprised and delighted to see that Twister is making a comeback with the younger set; if you don’t remember how physical that game was… it’s time to dust it off and give it a go.

© 2009 JJ Virgin & Associates, Inc. JJ Virgin, PHD, CNS is a celebrity wellness expert, author, public speaker and media personality. She is internationally recognized as the leader of the Weight Loss Resistance Revolution™ and trains other health care professionals in her program. She is the president of the National Association of Nutrition Professionals, www.nanp.org.

If you are frustrated with your body and feel like nothing you are doing is working, take her free quiz “Are You Weight Loss Resistant?” at www.jjvirgin.com and receive her monthly LEANzine loaded with insider information on fighting fat and getting lean for life!

So I’m gonna start trying something different here. I’m getting a lot of guys asking about what they should wear to the wedding and if they don’t want to rent the suit, then where do they get a great suit that won’t cost them a small fortune. So I’m gonna start my SUIT UP! Section. I’ll be recommending suits, custom suits, made just for you that range in price from $300 – $500. (A fraction of her dress cost.)

This week it’s the Vancouver Drizzle Suit, coming in at $319.00 USD. The weather in Vancouver is so grey it has inspired its own suit. The Vancouver Drizzle suit is one of the easiest suits you can wear. While at first glance you may not think it, this suit goes with everything. It works well with pink, white, blue, or even purple shirts. The light gray works well with many different skin types and has the great ability to make every and anything else you wear look better. Light gray is a complementary color; that is what it is supposed to do.

Click here to start your shopping, and as I always say…”She gets a great new dress, why can’t you have a new suit?”

By Simon Daykin

A few months back I was having drinks with a friend of my sister in law who was getting married, being the music snob that I am, I had to ask what DJ he had hired. He replied that he was using his I-pod hooked into the venue system. He said he had a great play list picked out and he didn’t think he needed a DJ. Of course, I warned him about this. So last weekend I ran into him at the aforementioned Sister in law’s housewarming party…I asked him how it went and he said people hated it, his taste wasn’t in line with all the guests and people weren’t dancing. Sure I-pods are cool and all, but it’s called a personal MP3 player for a reason. It’s your taste and your music. I highly recommend getting a DJ, they can read the crowd and change up the music as needed. Even if you need to trim your budget in other areas to get the DJ, go for it, if no one dances, they will remember that your party kinda sucked. And you don’t want that!

By Ciara Daykin

Bridal shows can be completely OVERWHELMING for a bride. There are so many other brides, so many booths, everyone is trying to get from point to point and it can really get crazy. In this special edition of my ezine I’m going to give you some savvy tips and tricks for hitting the bridal expo with style and sass!!

Tip #1: Wear comfy shoes! – You’re going to be walking a mile on a hard tradeshow floor. Yes, it’s lovely to look fashionable but the brides in stilettos never last long at the bridal expo. If you really want to see everything and be comfortable think about your feet first! (But be a little elegant and leave the stinky gym sneakers at home… opt for some cute supportive flats.)

Tip #2: 1000 Brides Gather In 1 Place – You think it might be a bit of a mob scene? Well then you’re absolutely right! If you really want to get some valuable one on one time with the exhibitors I recommend planning the timing of your visit to the Expo. When the fashion show is taking place the booths slow down significantly. This is a great time to chat with an exhibitor or try on dresses at the gown sale. I also recommend first thing in the morning (especially if you want your pick of all those frugally priced gowns).

Tip #3: Your Hand Will Cramp – Many exhibitors will be offering prizes at their booths and you’ll be asked to fill out a ballot form. You waste valuable time writing out your contact info again and AGAIN. So print off a couple sheets of labels that include your name, your groom’s name, your wedding date, your address, phone number and email. Then it will be easy to just peel and stick your info to the ballots. Then you can spend quality time checking out all the cool stuff on display!

Tip #4: Watch Out For Bridezilla! – I often see the dreaded bridezilla at the Bridal Expo. You know her… she’s the girl that pushes your Mom aside so she can get a better look at the booth, she criticizes your wedding colors when she overhears you gushing about them, she muscles her way to the prize box while telling the exhibitor she doesn’t want any information (just the prize!) and she complains loudly about how expensive everything is…. Oh yes… Bridezilla always makes an appearance at the Bridal Expo. But don’t let this kind of bride ruin your good time! She has a bunch of BAD karma surrounding her so just IGNORE HER and have some fun!

Tip #5: Be Patient & Be Nice – Be the opposite of bridezilla. The exhibitors at the show have brought some really great deals with them… some that you won’t even know about unless you talk to them! It’s true! At our booth I have a SPECIAL OFFER JUST FOR YOU!! If you come to my booth I’ll give you a special gift if you introduce yourself to me and let me know you read my ezine. But I’m ONLY giving this gift to brides on my ezine list that visit my booth- no exceptions. But I might be a little busy, so please be patient and look around our booth because I do want to talk to all the brides that come by.

This kind of mentality will get you far with other exhibitors as well. I find myself giving extra nice brides FREE advice! I know other exhibitors do too!! (because we all want to work with nice brides)

Tip #6: Hydrate! – The Round Up Centre with over 1000 people in it at any given time can heat up pretty quick. And you can bet the water ain’t cheap! So bring along some water for your journey. You don’t want to get a headache!!

Tip #7: One Step at a Time – Okay, the truth is that there are going to be A LOT of booths, people, and noise at the Bridal Expo. But it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. YES, there are a lot of choices but you don’t have to choose EVERYTHING or choose ANYTHING right there and then. Here are a couple of TIPS within my TIPS to dealing with all the choices:

•  Seek And Ye Shall Find – Know what you are looking for and enjoy the rest. Don’t feel like you have to choose ALL your vendors from the Bridal Expo. This is just a sampling of some of Calgary’s finest. You may connect with some vendors, you may not. This is a great opportunity to meet people face to face and figure out if they should be part of your wedding day.
• One by One – Approach each vendor calmly, ready to hear the sales pitch (yes- the sales pitch). The exhibitors are there to sell to you. You’re there to buy right? So if someone is overwhelming you just ask them politely to SLOW DOWN. You don’t need the info dump! Ask the questions you want answered.
• Thanks But No Thanks – If you’re not interested thank them and walk away. Don’t take the flyer and load up your bridal bag. Guess what? You’ll quickly rifle through that bag ONCE after the expo, pulling out the vendors you connected with… and then it’ll sit in your closet to be found on your 2 year wedding anniversary!

BONUS: Tip #8: Overwhelmed? Come Relax With Me – The day can get a bit hairy but think of my booth as a sanctuary. Come by and enjoy the elegance, look at pretty wedding photos and chat with us about your wedding. It’s really hard to figure out which exhibitors you should be seeing and I can point you in the direction of some of my favorites. I can also tell you about our FABULOUS programs that will do ALL the work for you (they make you feel like a celebrity!). So always know that I’m waiting at Booth 115 with a smile (and a hug if you need it!)

Ciara’s Bridal Advice

Good luck and I’ll see you there!! Don’t forget to introduce yourself to me for my SPECIAL OFFER, available ONLY to subscribers of my ezine!

By Simon Daykin

It may have been Valentine’s day, it may have been on vacation or it may have been during a hot air balloon ride (Congrats Steve & Sonya), but you got engaged…you’ve done a bit of planning, and while you were hiding the newspaper (like Marge did to Homer when the Chili Fest came to town) your bride to be has found out that there is a huge Bridal Show in Calgary and now she wants you to come as well. This is a full day of wandering around the Round Up Center looking at booth after booth, most of which couldn’t care less if you were there or not. Most vendors go after the Bride and the Bride only. It’s why I started Gutsy Groom in the first place and it’s why I work full time with my wife at Firefly Occasions to make sure the Groom isn’t left out and that his ideas are fully incorporated into the wedding planning process and the wedding day.

WHAT DO YOU AS THE GROOM DO????

As a planner & event designer, I attend this event twice a year, so I’m going to impart some tips to you on how to survive this day, keep your bride happy and make it out alive.

Comfort And Style

The trick is to mesh the two. You need to walk around all day, stand on concrete and look good while doing it. You wouldn’t wear track pants to go buy a new car, so why slum it for the Bridal Show? Project a high end image and high end vendors will be drawn to you. This is simple attraction. Vendors interview you just as much as you interview them, so put on a nice shirt, good pair of jeans and a kick ass pair of COMFORTABLE shoes. I’m not saying show up in a 3 piece suit, but dammit man, LOOK GOOD! I started going to this event in a T-shirt and jeans years ago, now that I plan 6 figure weddings, I dress the part.

Versatile Clothing Is Good

A dress shirt is good, as I find that they seem to blast the A/C, but when all those people get into that space…man it gets hot. I get cranky when I overheat so I always make sure I can change my body temp quickly and whenever possible, without having to carry anything. So with a dress shirt, you can roll up the sleeves, let off some steam and this will keep you in a better mood and not overheated all day.

Sure you can take a sweater off, but then you have to carry it.

I also recommend, that if you bring a coat, leave it in the car. It’s not that far from the car park to the doors, and you DO NOT want to be carrying around a coat all day. With Calgary you never know what the weather will be like, but trust me, if your fiancé brings a coat, odds are you’ll be carrying it around when she gets hot. So leave yours in the car so you won’t be carrying around two. And avoid the coat check (if there is such a thing) as that’s just another line you’ll have to wait in.

Happy Feet Ain’t Just For The Penguins

ALWAYS make sure you have a comfy pair of shoes on. You’ll be walking around all day and standing while you chat to vendors or your fiancé does. The floors in the Round Up Center are concrete. Being on concrete for hours on end takes a toll on the feet. And after the feet go, the legs follow and then it’s all downhill from there. I usually wear a pair of sneakers or the shoes I picked up at the Bridal Centre (patent leather sneakers) I’m not saying head out and buy new shoes for the show, go through the closet and see what you have. But make sure they have a nice, comfy sole on them. Cushioning will get you through the day and save the pain in your legs when you hit hour 4. This is a big venue and you’ll be doing A LOT of walking.

Hydration Is Key

So I know that the show is on a Sunday and Saturday nights are a great party night. But this is only ONE day out of countless weekends you’ll have in your life. Do yourself AND your fiancé a favor and don’t go out and get sloshed on Saturday night. Trust me on this, you’ll pay for it tenfold the next day.

So no hangovers OK guys!?!!

That being said, the recycled air will dry you out almost as fast. I suggest bringing a large water bottle, sure they sell water and but there is that whole line thing again. Bring Vitamin water, Powerade, whatever gets you through. I strongly suggest passing on your Red Bull type drinks as they induce a rather nasty crash after a couple of hours. (And if you leave that coat in the car, carrying a water bottle around isn’t that bad.) If you do need a “pick me up” type drink I suggest those little 5 hour energy drinks they sell at the gas station. I use these on long road trips and I can say they work, and have little to no crash at the end. I think they may include a bottle of water in your “welcome Package”…but you’ll go through that in no time flat. And remember to eat as well…the burgers are actually quite good.

Take It All In

This type of event can be very overwhelming, so take your time. If you find a vendor you like, get all their contact info, make a note on it so you don’t forget what it was you liked about them and keep it somewhere safe. There is so much info passed out at these things that the good stuff can get lost in the shuffle. If you can make an appointment with the vendor on the spot for a later date, do so. Take the time to talk to the vendor and get a feel for them and the services they offer. If you take an interest in stuff instead of hanging back and moping, the day will go by faster, your fiancé will love you for it and you’ll be able to get some of your ideas incorporated in your special day as well.

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

While this may not be the greatest day ever…it doesn’t have to be the worst. Follow the simple steps listed above and it’ll go smoothly. If your fiancé brings other people, ie: her mother, maid of honor, any bridesmaids…anyone really. Listen to what they have to say, add your opinion, but NEVER get into a fight with any of them. You can discuss all the info you gather when you get home with the only person who really matters…YOUR WIFE TO BE.

We are flooded with calls after the show, so if you want to meet with us after meeting us at the show, we can hook you up on the spot and make a sit down appointment with you. This way you won’t have to wait and you’ll have pick of the times we offer for meetings. If you’d like to secure your meeting now, simply click here and let me know the details of the wedding and I’ll book you in for a meeting.

It means a lot to your bride to have you involved so suck it up and go in with your head held high and the best of intentions. You may actually have a great time.

Well guys, it’s that time of year again…Bridal Expo time! We’ll of course be there so stop by to see the latest trends in the industry at our booth. We’re using some amazing stuff that no one else in Canada has ever used, we used it for a backdrop and table cloths at a wedding a couple of weeks ago and let me tell you…the stuff is AMAZING!!! So this is the day your bride talks you into going to visit a TON of vendors, all in one place and it can get pretty exhausting and overwhelming, plus…they don’t even serve BEER! So stay tuned- I’m gonna run you through a few tips to make the day a little easier on you. It’s not really that bad, and it makes her happy so suck it up and go make you wife to be happy. And if you get overwhelmed, just pop by the Firefly Occasions booth and I’ll be there to answer any of your questions.

Looking forward to seeing you on Sunday September 27th at the Round Up Center. The show runs from 10:00am- 5:00pm.

We always seem to book up after this show, so if you’d like to secure your free consultation to discuss your wedding planning and décor needs, click here to book an appointment.

By Simon Daykin

Two things can happen if you clink your glass long and hard enough at a wedding reception. The bride and groom will kiss, or the glass will break. I don’t know about you, but I HATE glass clinking, I mean I cannot even put into words how much I detest this cliché of a tradition. Luckily, a lot of my clients feel the same way and are looking into new ideas for the old kissing game thing.

There are tons of options out there but I’m going to give you the 3 that I like the best. If none of these get you going, feel free to hit the ‘net and look for alternatives to the clinking of glasses (Coz glass clinking sucks!)

This Is How We Do It

At our wedding, we pre-selected a bunch of married couples (letting them know ahead of time of course) and called upon them to show us how it’s done. They would kiss and then my wife and I had to mimic that kiss. It started out pretty simple but as the dinner and speeches progressed and the wine took effect, we had some pretty crazy stuff going on. I suggest spacing out the kissing and having your MC announce the couple, introduce them and then have them kiss. Also, let them know to keep it PG-13 tops, you may have kids there and they don’t need to see your Uncle go all 9 ½ weeks on his wife!

Are You Questioning Me?

Another alternative to the dreaded glass clinking can be asking the couple questions related to their life together so far or questions in general. You can certainly ask trivial pursuit questions, but get a few different editions, add in some cool ones, Lord of the Rings, Movie stuff, Music stuff and the original version as well. If the couple gets the answer right, they are in the clear, if they answer wrong…It’s kissin’ time! I love when relatives and friends get up to the mic, introduce themselves and ask one of the couple a question about the other. These questions can be from their childhood, the time they were dating etc. No questions about how many people the other person has slept with or dated, keep it specifically to the couple. I had a grandfather get up and ask the bride what kind of sandwich the groom used to make every day when he came home from school…and she got it right!!!

Dance Rummy, Dance!

My final suggestion to spare your glassware is this…there is always a dance floor at a wedding, so let’s use it shall we? Sure it gets used later in the night but let’s get people out there sooner. Have the DJ bring a cordless mic (most include this anyway). Have the MC announce that glass clinking will get you nowhere and if you want the couple to kiss you have these options, you can take to the dance floor and show the couple a few fancy moves, you can sing them a love song or you can share a memory you have of the couple (content appropriate of course) What’s great is you can have the videographer record all this and it makes a great addition to the wedding video. At the end of each performance, he couple has to kiss and the glassware is still intact.

Simon’s Gutsy Groom Advice

Some traditions are great, “You may now kiss the bride” should certainly be included in your wedding. But clinking glasses, I don’t think so. The only traditions you should be concerned about are the traditions you are going to start. Don’t include something in your wedding just because the websites or your family says that’s the way it is supposed to be. Don’t be afraid to start new traditions, add new ideas into your wedding. As long as you like them, it’s all good. It is your wedding day after all. I pride myself on working with my couples to get everything they want added into the special day and make sure it is a combination of their personalities and the things they want to bring into the wedding.

Click here to book a free consultation and get started planning your one of a kind wedding, you want your wedding to stand out in the sea of weddings that happen every year. You want your guests walking away from your wedding saying how great and original it was and then next year they will be comparing everyone else’s wedding to yours. And we can make that happen for you.