She Says: Be a Gracious & Grateful Bride- The Best Kind

By Ciara Daykin

I was reminded recently of a bride who neglected to thank her sister-in-law during a wedding shower and it tragically led to a 2-year rift in their relationship. The bride’s misstep in not thanking the other person was completely unintentional. It simply happened because she was invited to say a few words to everyone during the shower and she was so nervous speaking in public that she forgot to mention her sister-in-law. Long story short: Her sister-in-law didn’t speak to her for 2 years and the relationship is only now being mended.

It totally sucks and you don’t want this to happen to you!

There are a lot of things going on in a bride’s life as she gets ready for her wedding. Between showers and rehearsals and just showing off your ring and the wedding day itself, there’ll be a lot of times when peoples’ eyes are on you. Being the center of attention can be fun, but only if you’re ready.

If you haven’t done so yet, take the time to prepare a handful of speeches/ talking points which you can have memorized and ready to deliver at a moment’s notice. While you may not be giving speech after speech you’ll be telling your story multiple times… and there may be some parts you want to keep private, so figuring out what you want to share before you’re asked is the best idea. But don’t memorize them to the point where your delivery makes you sound like a robot. Here are some things you’ll need to cover:

• How did you get engaged?- People will want to know and you’ll need to say it over and over. Make sure your story matches the mood of the engagement. Was it romantic? Make sure you highlight the romance in your story. Was it spontaneous? Make sure you highlight the spontaneity. Was it fun? Zany? Unusual? Highlight those elements and talk about why it is special to you. It’s fun to relive the moment and share why you said yes!
• So dear… tell me about yourself?- His Aunty is sure to ask this one if you’re just getting to know his extended family. You might want to tell a couple of sentences about yourself, about your groom, and about what you plan to do once you’re married–  such as where you’ll live and what your aspirations are.
• Who should I be thanking?- You don’t want to forget anyone in your main wedding or rehearsal speech so start making a list of who to thank and when. It can hurt a relationship forever if you’re seen as the ungrateful bride. Remember that the people who’ve helped you put on your wedding are doing it because they love you but mega emotions are involved in a wedding and it is a time that can either solidify or destroy relationships.

Ciara’s Bridal Advice

Speaking in front of people can be scary, but what better way to let your personality shine through? Just be yourself and be sincere and your speech will be a hit. And don’t forget- your groom will more than likely have to give a speech or two as well, and he’s probably just as worried about it as you are! So why not write your speeches together and practice them on one another? Don’t forget to thank him in your speech either. He’s been putting up with all this wedding chaos too.

A BONUS TIP- Get some great thank you cards and practice the art of appreciation. Whether a friend buys you a wedding magazine, your aunt sends you some lace from your Gramma’s dress, or your girlfriends throw you a shower- you should be sending out sincere thank you cards. The more thank you cards sent before the wedding the more joy there will be at your wedding. (In my DIY Wedding Planning System I have a whole template to make thanking easy- it’s 50% off right now with code HOLIDAYS09.)

Ciara Daykin is the CEO of Firefly Occasions Inc. a wedding and event planning company with offices in Calgary, Alberta Canada and Beverly Hills, California, USA. Ciara’s popular bi-weekly ezine newsletter is read by over 7500 brides. Ciara is a frequent speaker at wedding industry functions and coaches other wedding planners across North America.

Ciara provides each bride she works with the haute couture wedding experience. Her planning website can be found at http://www.fireflyoccasions.com/ where you can sign up for her free report, “10 Tips to Take Your Wedding From Cookie Cutter to Couture.” She and her husband Simon Daykin are a husband and wife planning team and document their adventures on their popular blog http://sheandheplanweddings.com/

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